Media Influences and the Red Pill
What I'm learning about how TV and movies influence our actions and our kids
A long time ago, my husband brought to my attention how much men are disgraced in mainstream television. It wasn’t something I had noticed before. But once I swallowed that red pill, I started noticing it a lot more.
I noticed that men are made to look weak. Made to be the butt of most of the jokes. Shown as big blubbering idiots that grovel at the feet of the women characters. Frankly, once I was red pilled, I was disgusted.
After I became an adult, I didn’t watch a lot of television. So this trend was something that slipped by me pretty easily. But as I thought about it, I wondered how much of it I had become used to as a kid. We watched A LOT of TV when I was growing up.
Recently, I watched “Fuller House.” It wasn’t a great show, which probably isn’t a surprise, but it was full of nostalgia for this 90s kid who grew up watching Full House.
As I recently wrapped up the series, I was smacked with a few things. The women in the show are mothers now. And at the end of one of the episodes the moms justify drinking wine because they had hard days and “earned it”. I disagree with this sentiment entirely. Is motherhood challenging? YES. Is it an excuse to become an alcoholic? NOT EVEN A LITTLE. And the women in this show drink a lot. I was surprised to see this, but I shouldn’t have been. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not against having a drink, but I think mindset around having a drink is important. And since this show is “family friendly” I think showing that mothers have to drink to cope with motherhood was inappropriate.
Secondly, the men in this show are dumb. They dress in drag, they worry about the problem areas on their bodies, they are weak, they grovel to the women in their lives. Not an example I want my children to see.
Thirdly, there was a parent (not a main character) that brought his daughter over for a playdate. He was portrayed as a disgraceful parent because he had taught his kid not to eat junk food, asked if the apples were organic, and practiced gentle parenting. This parent had a lot (not all) things in common with how I know many awake parents practice raising their kids. This parent, who was not “going with the flow” of things was shamed.
In the same episode as the awake parent, the main characters explain to Uncle Jesse (an older original cast member who has a young adopted daughter in this series) that when it comes to disciplining the children, they leave it to the teachers now. They tell him to stay out of a conflict and let the teacher do it. DISGRACEFUL.
It made me wonder if Full House was full of the same things and how that might have influenced my young mind as a child.
And all of this is in a “family friendly” show. I think this show is geared toward 90s kids, now adults, but is “tame” enough for kids to watch, too. There is plenty of content that is geared toward kids. But we’re even being influenced as adults.
WE NEED TO BE CAREFUL WITH WHAT WE LET OUR KIDS WATCH.
I have been thinking a lot about what I allow my children to watch. Most of you know that Disney is grooming our children. I have read a lot about this and still have a lot to learn. A lot to see. Red pills to take. But what I have learned, bothers me.
Monsters in movies are made to look misunderstood. With the exception of some of the older movies, the villains in a lot of Disney movies are often forgiven. For example, Moana. In this movie, the main villain, Te Kā is misunderstood Te Fiti. But Moana walks right up to her burning, lava throwing, ravaged form and hands her the key to turning her good. Without fear. Without doubt.
Children should be naturally afraid of monsters and people who look like they could cause harm. They should be shy around people they’ve never met. They should be afraid of the aggressive dog who lives down the street. They shouldn’t walk up to that dog and just hand it a treat because they’ve been quietly groomed to think that the dog is safe, just misunderstood. It will bite them, could kill them.
I won’t even go into child predators, I don’t have that in my heart to write about here, but hopefully you get the picture.
Our natural instincts are important. They are what should help to keep us safe. I want my kids to ask me questions. I want them to feel nervous about the raving lunatic they see on a street corner as we drive through a crowded metropolitan area. I am not afraid of teaching my kids about these things, but I am not going to let the media do it for me.
As a 90s kid I am re-programming myself. I was influenced by Disney and others when I was a kid. Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, Lilo and Stitch, etc groomed me to think that dangerous people just might be misunderstood and we should “give them a chance".
The other day I took my children for a walk and we saw a man that I didn’t feel comfortable walking past. In the back of my mind I thought to myself, “he’s probably harmless.” But I was with my kids and I want them to learn to steer clear of people who make them nervous and I didn’t want to walk them past him either.
My eldest really wanted to go down the path where he was. I had to pull her aside and explain to her that some people might be sick in their minds and act in ways that we don’t expect or aren’t right. That it’s important to stay away from people like that and keep ourselves safe, even if we really want to explore that trail.
It is never wrong to protect your kids, even from perceived threats.
I also think we need to protect our kids from the media they consume. And we need to protect ourselves. We need to wake up and see what shows we watch and what we let our kids watch have hidden messages.
Here is a brief list of some movies I let my kids watch currently:
Kubo and the Two Strings
Song of the Sea
All of the Narnia movies
Iron Giant
Call of the Wild
Snow White and the Seven Dwarves
Cinderella
Frozen (up for negotiation fyi)
Homeward Bound
Encanto
These are just a few and not all of them are great, but sometimes I look at the good underlying messages, too. If you’re interested in more, check out this thread on my Twitter page for recommendations.
I am still working on this. But I am awake now. I am starting to see.
We need to protect ourselves and our children.
Please feel free to comment or DM on Twitter @bowtiedangel if you have questions.